Saturday, May 8, 2010

Another "FUN" Look



The Picture on the left was taken in December, the height of my Piggy season. The picture on the right was taken last weekend in St. Augustine, 24 pounds later. I am thrilled to see that my head now appears to belong on my body once again and that my face is no longer eating my eyes. Men have begun giving me compliments again. It makes me blush and flutter my lashes.

Sunday, May 2, 2010

Piggy Bloggy Banner Update

Another squandered post...just a few days away from my next weigh in and I'm just now posting the last one!

Well, I updated the Piggy Bloggy Title Banner; what do you think? I think that 25 pounds (almost officially) is worthy of posting ones fat ass self next to ones skinnier self for the world to see, don't you?

Friday, April 23, 2010

Who Knows What The T Is Anymore?!?!

I have been chided for being a poor blogger (bloggette? bloggist?). I realize I have been rather remiss in my reporting to you, dear reader, on my disappearing waistline. In all honesty, it's not because I don't enjoy telling you all of my trials and tribulations through this incredible journey of rediscovering what my body is supposed to look like ("Oh, so that's what my toes look like...neat-o!"), it really is because life has been carrying me away into other things un-piggy-bloggie-like. I think it may be a side effect of my diet program/life style change/weight loss that I don't have the time, too: I have so much more energy! I am pinging off the walls most days. When it is time to leave work, I don't feel as if I have been to work at all! Some days, hubby has to remind me to leave and come home. Then once I get home, it is no longer straight to the couch...it is outside to the orchids or to do laundry or planning the next thing. It's exciting to start dreaming again and being able to visualize the dreams coming true.

So....as of Tuesday the 20th...21.8 pounds and 4.5 inches. I'm going to the beach this weekend and I'm going to wear a swimsuit in PUBLIC.

Tuesday, March 30, 2010

T + 37 Days - WEIGH IN WEEK FIVE

It's a miracle! I have reached my first "unspoken" goal: dropped below the dreaded 170 pound mark! It's been probably 10 or 12 years since I've been able to get below 170 pounds. I am amazed. I can't believe it. Check out my stats!
















Does this inspire me to keep losing, you want to know? HELL YES, IT DOES. 150 pounds doesn't seem that far away anymore. 140 pounds seems a lot closer and almost, dare I say it, reasonable! Crazy, I know! 


I did the numbers on the BMI calculator and was so happy to see that I am only 10 pounds away from being within the "normal weight" BMI range for the first time that I can remember since my late twenties. That's a piece of cake...er...um, celery, I mean.



Tuesday, March 23, 2010

T + 30 Days - WEIGH IN WEEK FOUR

Here are the stats for week 4...



I'm a little disappointed in my weight loss this week. One pound! Man! You would think that an average calorie intake of 600 per day would yield just slightly more than one pound. It is kind of nice that I have lost another 2 1/2 inches since the last measurement two weeks ago. I can really notice the difference. It is amazing how much better my clothes fit me! My bra fits, I mean really comfortably fits around the circumference of my body. Usually, it's hanging on for dear life by the last hooks, ripping from the seams, as my third and forth rolls spill over the top and bottom of the elastic back. Now, I bypass the third hooks and the second...I've graduated to the first! And NO fat roll spillage! Yes! That is a delicious feeling.

I had planned to wait to purchase new clothes until I reached my goal weight, but I don't think it's possible to wait anymore. My pants keep falling off and my work pants don't have belt loops, so very soon I will be walking the halls at work and my slacks will just wiggle off. That will be the embarrassing side of weight loss and I don't want to go there! So, maybe this week I'll head out for a good Steinmart spree. Yipee!

Wednesday, March 17, 2010

T + 23 Days - WEIGH IN WEEK THREE

Yes, I know, I'm totally slacking on the blog thing! I just have no motivation to get on the computer after being on the computer all day! With luck, new inspiration will come to me soon.

In the meantime, I do want to share some great news...my three week weigh in was yesterday. Here are the stats!

Saturday, March 13, 2010

T + 19 Days

It's humiliating when you break a deal with yourself in front of friends. I know I have been away from the blog a few days and have no good excuse. I have an excuse, it's just not good.

Thursday and Friday at work were busier than I have been in ages -- and with me, that is busy. Once I made it home, all I wanted to do was eat my meager meal and hit the sack...and that's what I did. Friday, I missed lunch altogether and actually forgot to go get my shots at Medi-Weightloss. By the time I remembered, the clinic was closed.

In other words, I neglected my health for my job. This is a familiar path for me and not one I want to travel down again. Fortunately, I have had a wonderfully restorative day today and had the meditative time to see that I was beginning to dabble in a little of that old familiar self sabotage. I took some time to refocus on my goal, give myself a pat on the back (I mean 8.8 pounds and 1" gone in 2 weeks deserves some self-respect) and count my blessings.

In order to figure out what those blessing were, I decided to list some of my favorite life things to help remind me why I want to be lose weight, be healthy, happy and whole:

  • Cardinals chirping at dawn
  • The green tint the world takes on when a storm is coming in summer
  • Night birds singing
  • Clean sheets
  • Open windows in springtime
  • The snooze button
  • The smell of sun-kissed skin
  • A tall, cold glass of water on a hot day
  • Popping bubble-wrap
  • Confections
  • Getting a bra that actually fits
  • Feeling as safe with my husband as I did with my parents
  • Finding old friends...and they still love you
  • Doggie Birthday parties (Dexter and Roo, One & Two, April 1st!)
Taking a deep breath and a starting fresh tomorrow. 

Wednesday, March 10, 2010

T + 16 Days

Below are a few nuggets of knowledge that I have gleaned from my weight loss journey:
  • Your weight effects you in many ways other than your appearance.
    • Self-esteem
    • Health risks
    • Depression
    • Physical Ability
  • To lose weight effectively, you have to permanently change four aspects of your life:
    • What you eat
    • How you eat
    • Your behavior 
    • Your activity level
  • Small goals are easier to reach than big ones.
  • Don't weigh yourself every day. That is just depressing and will be discouraging.
  • You must have a good support system. Your inner voice can be loud. It's good to have outer voices that can drown it out. 
  • Go public. Tell everyone you know that you are going on a diet. It will hold you more accountable. 
  • Meditate.
  • Don't compare yourself to other people. You are the warm, calm center of the Universe. No one else is you.
  • Keep a food journal, like I do on FatSecret.com. It keeps you focused and accountable to yourself.
I'm sure I'll come up with plenty more as I travel down this path, but so far, those are the big ones that I have noticed.

Tuesday, March 9, 2010

T + 15 Days - WEIGH IN WEEK TWO

 I'm just going to let the numbers speak for themselves!!! 










Monday, March 8, 2010

T + 14 Days

Monday, Monday. Another week has started, which means another week ended. How would I evaluate my own personal progress so far? I would say I have followed the program about 75% of the way; unfortunately, I have not been able to get in any of the recommended exercise during the second week. I know, I know, there is really more than enough time in the day to do it, but I suppose that the regiment of pill taking and food measuring still has me a little encompassed in those activities related to the weight loss and the exercise seems secondary. Once I feel like I have a 100% handle on the food, then I think I will be able to approach exercise. 


I think I am starting to let go of those cravings for food that I used to have. It reminds me of when I quit smoking. The first three or four days were so hard; all I could do was think about cigarettes. They were my friends, my companions. I missed them. I had to tell myself to get through each day in five minute increments. By the end of the first week, I was forgetting that urge at my usual smoke break times; by the end of the second week, I was free. I think I am almost free of food cravings now. Don't get me wrong...I would love to have a submarine sandwich on crusty French bread with roast beef and swiss, but I don't need it and won't pout if I don't get it. I know that French Bread will be the end of me, so I won't do it, just like I know I won't have that cigarette, ever. 


I just remember the first Medi-Weightloss "Tip For Successful Weight Loss":

  • Be Positive - One of your biggest obstacles in weight loss is yourself. If you think you are overweight, you likely will be. If you believe it is only based on genetics and has nothing to do with you, you will never know and you will never lose weight. Your weight needs a positive nudge in the right direction. Be optimistic about your weight. The more control you feel that you have, the more control you actually will have. 

Saturday, March 6, 2010

T + 12 Days

Yesterday I cheated a little. Not on the diet, but on the blog posting. Sorry about that. I have to tell you, my week was long and stressful and I was in a mood. What kind of mood, you ask? Well, the kind that generally would have resulted in my begging dearest husband to either:

  1. Take me to a restaurant where they serve tons of bread and have at least 20 items whose descriptions end in "smothered in mozzarella cheese" or
  2. Take me to a restaurant where they serve tons of tortilla chips and have at least 20 items whose descriptions end in "smothered in Queso."
Of course, the dinner would have been followed by a trip to Marble Slab Creamery, Jeremiah's Italian Ice or Cold Stone Creamery, no matter how full and disgusting we felt. Why? Isn't it obvious? Because I deserved it. I had a bad week. I remember one time we went to Fishbone's Orlando and the food was so amazing, we ate so much I literally could not sit up straight in the car seat on the way home. Not only did I have to recline the seat back as far as it would go, I also had to unbutton and unzip my pants. I'm just a girl who can't say no! 

Which brings me to today. We knew that "events" might be a challenge when it came to eating. How would I handle myself? Would I find an excuse to cheat? Today is our 6th wedding anniversary, so we were teetering on if we should go traditional, tempt fate and head to a restaurant or if we should just bite the bullet and hang at home. Without really planning it, during a day of consuming (going out and buying things we don't really need), dearest hubby found himself hungry. I, of course, being the warm, calm center of the Universe and on appetite suppressants could probably go for days on the "fat of the land" right now, but hubs is still a calorie burning, food consuming machine, albeit eating much better now that I am dieting. So anyway, we found ourselves "out there"...in the wild...needing sustenance. As a side note, there are many, many fast food restaurants open in the Longwood/Lake Mary area at 1:30 p.m. on a Saturday, but there are virtually no sit down restaurant open (until 3:00 p.m. or later). We drove around for about an hour before finally stumbling upon a Romano's Macaroni Grill. I was thinking I could order a fish dish and eat in serious moderation and maybe stay in a decent calorie range and have to admit, I was a little worried. We sat down and the waitress came over and wrote her name upside down on the paper table cloth and reached over to pour big globs of olive oil onto a plate (the prelude to the nummy bread) and my darling supportive husband said, "No, we won't need that. We are watching what we eat." Our waitress, Shannon, looked at us both and said, "Well, do you want me to go get you our other menu then? It has 10 items on it that are less than 600 calories." Other menu? What is this? Is there some hidden world for dieters I was unaware of? This menu has never been presented to me before. Interesting! I learned from Shannon that you have to ask. Hmmm. I like it. 

I had a wonderful warm Scallop and Spinach salad: Seared sea scallops with fresh spinach, wilted and tossed with aged prosciutto, roasted garlic, fresh lemon and extra virgin olive oil. It was only 360 calories. I even reconstructed its ingredients in FatSecret.com to make sure and hit it pretty much right on the nose. The thing that fascinated me the most was that if I had not been on this diet, there is no way I would have ever branched out and tried such an amazing and wonderful dish. Nice going, Romano's. Really good job. 



Friday, March 5, 2010

Fat Barbie

Ha. See, it's not just me.

Thursday, March 4, 2010

T + 10 Days

Today was a good test of the Medi-Weightloss diet and philosophy which is to make eating well your way of life while feeling a sense of well being. My environment conspired in every way to tempt me to fail by adding as many stressors onto me as possible. I was able to fend off every attempt to get me to backslide: the "unexpected news" stressor -- candy bar needed, please! The "friend eating pizza right next to you" stressor: can I have a bite or maybe just let me have that, m-kay? The "my crisis is now your crisis" stressor: don't I have any double movie butter popcorn in my file cabinet? Through all that misery, I managed to stay on my diet without even blinking. Not only that, but I was able to remain calm in a couple of situations that normally may have sent me into some crazy, irrational stress reaction, like eating a Kit-Kat and a Milky Way bar after eating a meal replacement bar and some popcorn after a Philly Cheese-steak and onion rings for lunch. 


I did get a good giggle today. A group of us are going to lunch tomorrow and it was decided to let me pick where we should go. One of my friends said, "Why is she picking? All she is going to order is a diet coke and a plate". That cracked me up. With friends like that....

Wednesday, March 3, 2010

T + 9 Days

Since I'm on my second week today, I can now add either one cup of vegetables and one cup of fruit (off of a specific list, of course) or two of one or the other, plus my 500 protein calories. I have to make sure not to exceed 20 grams of carbs, but that is the only restriction. 

So here I sit, at 7:20 pm, after having had an EAS protein shake for breakfast and 3.5 ounces of chicken breast for lunch, not hungry. I have planned out dinner. I can have 2 ounces of spinach (which is ridiculous in size, so I think I cut it to about .5 ounces) and 3 ounces of cucumber. Topping off dinner is 5.5 ounces of salmon. It smells great, looks great, but I'm not hungry. This is an odd sensation. I thought for sure I would be insane for salad by now once I could have it, but I'm not. I don't seem to care. Weird. I can also not seem to get over the 500 calorie per day mark now that I am used to it. You would think I would have the opposite problem! 

If I can ever get home early enough to begin exercising, I am hoping that will change the whole equation. Until then, I still feel great, just seem to want to eat less. Not a bad thing!

Tuesday, March 2, 2010

T + 8 Days - WEIGH IN WEEK ONE

Woot Woot! I had my first weeks weigh in today and guess what? There really is a payoff to the 500 calories per day! I lost 5.6 pounds! I am so excited! Unreal. Nothing like having satisfying instant (relatively) gratification. It inspires me to lose more and eat less. Well, not less than 500 calories per day, but less than an elephant with a thyroid problem and a mean sweet tooth. 


I still find myself amazed at how easy this diet really has been. The people at Medi- Weightloss are so supportive and the one I go to in Winter Park  has a great crew. As they said on "Cheers", sometimes it's nice to go where everybody knows your name. 


The only part of this diet, er, um, new way of life that has not been successful is my Ketosis level. The Medi-Weightloss diet is a ketogenic diet. Which is what, you say? Ketosis is basically defined as the build-up of ketones in your bloodstream where your body produces ketones for fuel. When this happens your blood ketone concentration is higher than your glucose concentration. Ketosis drastically lowers insulin; which in turn causes your pancreas to start producing glucagon. After this happens while on a ketogenic diet, your body will basically go into a dramatic fat burning mode. Ketones are by products of fat metabolism and are an alternative source of fuel for the brain, heart, skeletal muscle and other oxygen requiring tissues to utilize in times of starvation, carbohydrate restriction or extended periods of exercise. A ketogenic type diet occurs basically by starving your body of carbohydrates and sugars. Glucagon is what determines if and how much ketones are produced in your bloodstream. 

So what does it mean that my Ketone levels are negative? Basically, although my body is being starved and shocked by being denied all of the sugars and carbs, it still thinks everything is cool. My body still doesn't feel in crisis enough to start burning the fat as an alternative fuel source.


I guess it's because I've been holding on to my fat for a long time. Or maybe because in my dreams I eat big slices of chocolate cake drenched in hot fudge smothered in cherries and ice cream. Whatever. 5.6 pounds works for me either way!

Monday, March 1, 2010

T + 7 Days

Yes, I skipped a day of the blog. God rested on Sunday so I should be allowed to as well. That is all I'm going to say about that. Humph.

I just read this and cracked up: "I Wish Someone would Do Something About How Fat I Am". Why is it so funny? To me, because it hits so close to home. I sat around for years just knowing that I was packing on those pounds and did nothing...except blame: blame holidays, blame my health, blame work, blame my schedule, blame boredom, blame, blame, blame. I would go to bed at night so disappointed in  myself over what I ate, feeling that acid churning in my stomach from the blend of Chic-Fil-A from breakfast, pizza from lunch and Mexican food from dinner. It was never enough, though, to keep me from doing it...day after day after day. I was like a squirrel packing away nuts for a long winter.

What was finally enough? What did it? I don't know for sure. Maybe knowing for sure that I was losing control over my weight as I had lost control over my smoking. I don't like losing control. I don't like people to ever get the impression I have lost control, even if I really am losing control. When you're fat, there is no hiding that you have lost control. It shows everywhere. Your clothes are too tight, you have three chins, you huff and puff going up and down stairs, your skin looks bad, you lose your energy.

I am ready to be in control again. I am in my happy Zen place. I am the warm, calm center of the Universe. And even though when you Google my zip code and 2,050,000 results for "restaurant" come up in .49 seconds, I vow to drive past them all.

Saturday, February 27, 2010

T + 5 Days

Another day, another 500 calories. Since it’s Saturday, I thought I might struggle a bit more with the random food cravings since I wasn't focused 90 miles an hour on work, work, work all day, but I did fairly well. I didn’t get out of bed at the usual 6:00 am because, let’s be honest, I don’t have to. Sleeping later put my pill and food schedules behind and I think that may have caused a slight disturbance in the force as I had a major energy dip around 4:00 pm and am now experiencing an upset tum-tum. I think I will get up at my normal work-day wake-up time tomorrow and see if that brings me back.

I wanted to take a minute to tell you about my friend, Elise, who is also working on some self improvement, albeit a different way. She is in the midst of a Boot Camp Fitness Training, something like what you see on “The Biggest Loser”. Here is an excerpt from the team blog, written by Elise:

“Basically, it was a "suicide" run between cones with certain exercises required at each cone (lunges, burpees, jump squats, skates, bicycles, push-ups, etc.) Each turn, you had to go to a cone, complete the exercise and return to the finish line (kettlebell swings) and then advance to the next cone. The kicker was that on the way up and down the line, you had to return to all previous cones and complete those exercises again (and again and again).”  

I am finding enormous inspiration from reading their blog, basically because what they are going through is just so much more difficult than what I am doing, at least right now. I know that next week I add exercise into my program, but it’s mild…none of the commando military drills my girl is suffering through. I am humbled by what a strong and beautiful woman she is (I always have been, though; this just makes me admire her more).

If you are interested in finding out what hell is like, check out their blog at gtokos.blogspot.com

Friday, February 26, 2010

T + 4 Days

I found a great application on my phone that really helps me chronicle my food intake, plan meals, journal and record my daily exercise. While stumbling through the app with those little bitty buttons I discovered, lo and behold, the app synced up to an actual website called FatSecret.com. My eyes have been opened and I am genuflecting to the great Gods of diet organization! I am a sucker for good organization and this site makes me want to succeed even more. The satisfaction I get from filling in the blanks and seeing the forms and fields fill up is delicious (not as good as, say, fudge brownies would be right about now, but satisfying in it's own OCD way).

Three days behind me...only 1500 calories consumed. Amazing! That is what I had for breakfast in my last life!

Thursday, February 25, 2010

T + 3 Days

I was in the midst of packing it in to head for the snuggly warmth of my bed with the hubby and min pins when I realized I hadn't really posted anything today. I figured it was ok, then I got that evil voice in my head that always drives me to do stuff saying, "you need to go ahead and say at least something". I am tying this blog into my weight loss discipline. If I give up on telling everyone how it's going, I am afraid I may just give up on my resolve to pass on that one wafer thin mint, if you know what I mean. Which leads to another, and another, and another, then, before you know it, I'll be standing in the bushes silently waiting to mug the next unsuspecting Girl Scout that comes along of her Tag-Alongs (oh, yum).

Well, then, here it is! This is a blog post reminiscent of Seinfeld...a post about nothing. 

The day went by fast today with little time to think about the diet or food; too much work to do. I packed my 5 ounces of turkey breast into my purse at lunch and hauled it into McDonald's while my compadres chowed down on double-cheeseburgers and fries. Believe it or not, I did fine with that. I think mostly because I have a lot to talk about and when there is little to eat I can occupy my mouth with words. I'm sure I'm the delight of everyone who knows me. 

I have to admit, by the time I got home from work at 6:30ish, I was getting hungry. My darling hubby had hunted and gathered shrimp and salmon for dinner, most certainly with his bare hands in the frozen oceans and streams, so while I did my after work wind down, he fancied up boiled shrimp and grilled salmon with Old Bay and blackening seasonings. I was allowed 10 medium shrimp and 3 ounces of salmon. It felt like a feast and I was so incredibly grateful for the harvest bestowed on me. So much so, that when the "Cookie Of The Day" email that I get from the cruel and heartless Martha Stewart touting a recipe for Dark Chocolate Espresso Cookies came in, I was almost, but not quite, able to keep from whimpering like a child.  

Love Handles Save Woman

This story made me snicker (mmmmm, Snickers) and gives me food for thought (get it)  when I consider my weight loss goals. Maybe I shouldn't lose weight after all. Fat saves lives.
Love Handles Save Woman's Life | The FOX Nation

Wednesday, February 24, 2010

T + 2 Days

My butt is killing me! I went over to Mediweightloss for my second series of shots today after work. It is really nice; for the shots, you don't need an appointment, you just need to pop in, drop 'em, take the pain, pay the extra $10 bucks if you so chose to get the additional B1&B6 shot (which I do) and go. They call it a drive by shooting. For some reason, I think that's funny. 


A little background on the B1&B6 Injection: the combination is supposed to boost metabolism, increase energy, enhance the immune system and nervous system, keep the skin and muscles healthy and encourage cell growth and division amongst other things. This shot is not essential on the program and is therefore an "extra" charge. When I read up on all the benefits, I decided that all those things sound pretty good to me, so I am going to opt for them for a while. Of course, those are the shots that feel like really mean, nasty bee with Drano for venom is stinging my sweet tender bum-flesh, but hey, I had major back surgery and walked out of the hospital the next day, so I can manage this. No problem.


How did I do with the diet today? The itsy bitsy teeny weeny 500 calories? I am happy to report that I did just fine, thanks. I may have embarrassed my friends just a little, though. We all went out for a birthday lunch to a Mexican restaurant. I brought my 5 ounces of turkey in my purse, like I was sneaking popcorn into a movie theater or something. When everyone else ordered, I asked for a diet coke and a plate. I'm not all that sure our very ethnic Mexican waitress fully grasped what was up, but my girls gave me some mixed reviews of"that's rude" and "good for you". I look at it like, well, as long as I didn't walk in there by myself, ask for a plate and a glass of water, sit in a booth on a busy day for an hour then leave without buying anything or tipping, I'm still good. Right? 


The only downside that has come up today is that I had to deny Dexter his little table scrap treat that I usually give him from my dinner plate. I think I growled at him when looked at me for a bite of my 3.5 ounce pork chop. 

Tuesday, February 23, 2010

T + 1 Day

1:45 pm - Taking a quick break from work to fill you in on how I'm feeling today after those shots. Granted, I haven't started the diet yet, nor the appetite suppressants or vitamins, so I am technically not official, but I have to keep up this journaling for your and my experience on this weight loss journey. Anyway, I feel pretty darn good. Really! I am in a good mood...I mean better than usual for no measurably good reason that I can discern other than a couple of shots in the butt last night. This gives me great hope for the future of this diet. I am looking forward to tomorrow. I am ready to start this thing up!

9:19 pm - Just finished up getting my food for tomorrow ready after eating 1/2 of a pepperoni pizza. What? You got a problem with that? It was more surprising than I really expected. You would think that 500 calories would be like three peanuts and a wafer thin mint, but it is actually a lot more food that your mind can believe. For breakfast, I am slated to have a hard boiled egg (75 calories) and a piece of Canadian bacon (55 calories). This is actually more than I usually eat, so I feel like I am coming out on the plus side already there. I can still have my coffee, but I do have to sub the milk for that crazy powdery crap Coffee Mate - pffft. It is worth the sacrifice. I'm going to put on my big girl face and take it like a man..... er, or well, you know what I mean. Lunch is 5 ounces of turkey breast, which when weighed is more than I think I can actually eat (175 calories). Dinner is 3.5 ounces of lean pork chop (195 calories). Dessert? No, not chocolate mousse or cupcakes --  (Isn't cupcake literally the most delightful word in the English language? Say it with me...cupcake. Doesn't that just make you happy inside and out?) -- I digress, dessert: Jello. Yup. The great nursing home favorite. I'm guessing that by days end I'll be so bored with stuffing my face with meat that I'll be glad to eat it, though.

I also set my phone to remind me to take my medications at the proper times: Phendimetrazine, Fat Burner Supplement, Calcium, Omega Three at 8:00 am;  Phendimetrazine, Fat Burner Supplement, Calcium, Omega Three at 11:00 am; Phendimetrazine at 3:00 pm (apparently it might make me a bit jumpy (great, just how everyone want already hyperactive Miki to behave, right?) so we don't take it any later than 6 hours before bedtime; Fat Burner Supplement and Omega Three at 7:00 pm. Then I had to program the reminders to remind me to go back to get the MIC and B1&B6 Injections around their hours and my work hours. Sounds as complicated as it was to set up; next step is to find out if it is actually as complicated follow through with!

Wish me luck! Tomorrow is the real BIG DAY. I'm ready. Let's do this thing!


Monday, February 22, 2010

The Big Day

Today is the day.

10:00 am - I had a chocolate chip cookie for breakfast and washed it down with a diet coke. I have been thinking about lunch since I woke up. I am going to eat something big and fattening. It will be like the last meal before the executioner. My appointment is at 6:00 pm, so I am going to eat whatever I can between now and then. Carpe Diem!

1:03 pm - Had a pulled pork sandwich on garlic bread with fried corn on the cob and a diet coke for lunch. Washed it down with two Reese's Peanut Butter Cups - damn, those are good. I am saving my very last chocolate chip cookie for around 3:00 pm. I will indulge the critical munch hour today. No holds barred.

9:21 pm - Home, finally. I got a reprieve from starvation. Since I didn't get out of the initial consultation and doctors physical and dietitian review until 8:15 pm, there was just no way we could make it to the grocery store to get all the things needed in order for me to start this diet tonight or more honestly, in the morning. So, Panera Bread! I got a big ol' cup of French Onion Soup with extra croutons and a lovely Sierra Turkey Sandwich. Ahh. Satisfaction.

Anyway, I did go to the appointment, which was interesting. They weighed me in at 184 pounds, so see, I lost 3 pounds walking in the door! Since I recently had blood work, they are requesting it from my PCP but they did do an EKG and vitals, as well as measurements, which were mortifying. Once the vitals were done, they immediately gave me two shots: the MIC Injection and the B1 & B6 Injection. The MIC Injection is a combination of vitamins, minerals and amino acids designed to help lose weight, including B12. You get these shots 3 times per week. The goal overall, the doc tells me, is to keep me happy while I am losing weight. Apparently, these shots, coupled with vitamins, a prescription of Phendimetrazine, calcium and Omega 3 are supposed to keep me calm, give me a sense of well being and keep me happy all while encouraging weight loss. In fact, the doc says you can hardly help but to lose weight as long as you follow the directions.

So, off I go to plan the shopping trip for my food, or lack thereof, for the next week. 500 calories a day. Yeesh. I am looking forward to not looking like Michael Moore anymore when I put on a sweatshirt and baseball cap, though.

Sunday, February 21, 2010

T - 1 Day

Pocrescophobia - Definition: The fear of gaining weight.

So, okay, for me it's not so much a fear, but a reality. I gain weight. I just do. Why? Well, there are so many reasons I can't really list them all, mainly because I can't remember all the health reasons at one sitting, but basically because it's boring. Mostly, I gain weight because I love to eat. I really do. It is my favorite fun time activity. When I want to celebrate, I eat. When I want to relax, I eat. When I want to create, I cook and bake, then I eat that. I love the way food tastes; I love the textures and the flavors. I love the spices and the herbs. I love the smells of breads and cakes and the way that icing melts on your tongue. I adore the way some foods are tasted on the tip of your tongue and some are tasted on the sides in the back. I love the differences between bitter and sweet. I swoon over chocolate and salt. Textures are seductive. Crunchy beer battered fried fish teases. Even celery can be tricky since it pairs so well with peanut butter. So, yes, I eat, I gain weight.

Exercise? I have all the best intentions, I do. My husband and I have a designated room for exercising with a Total Gym and a recumbent bike; it even has a television and stereo so you can't get bored. We have a Wii and it has Wii Fit. I stood on the balance board and it made a sad, sort of crying sound...the sound that your dog would make if you sat on him...and I put the damn thing away. I really don't need to be insulted by electronics, you know? Anyway, honestly, I am just not all that much in the mood most of the time to exercise. I have a lot of aches and pains from Fibromyalgia and I work long hours. When I get home from work, all I really want to do is eat for heaven's sake and maybe watch some Lost or What Not To Wear and get into bed. I feel like that isn't asking so much!

Which brings me to why we are here. Last week, dear hubby tells me he contacted MediWeight Loss for me and wants me to look into it. Not because he doesn't love me like I am (uh-huh) but because he worries about my health. I appreciate it and I know this costs a good amount of money, so I know he has put some thought into it. I have decided to go ahead with it, since the last time he was insistent on something like this, he managed to get me to quit smoking after 25 years.

Tomorrow night after work I have my first appointment. I am not 100% sure what to expect beyond what it says on the website:

www.mediweightlossclinics.com

I will try to keep up on how this adventure goes for me. I am looking forward to a "new" approach and am going into this with an open mind and outlook.

Todays weight: 187!!!