Pocrescophobia - Definition: The fear of gaining weight.
So, okay, for me it's not so much a fear, but a reality. I gain weight. I just do. Why? Well, there are so many reasons I can't really list them all, mainly because I can't remember all the health reasons at one sitting, but basically because it's boring. Mostly, I gain weight because I love to eat. I really do. It is my favorite fun time activity. When I want to celebrate, I eat. When I want to relax, I eat. When I want to create, I cook and bake, then I eat that. I love the way food tastes; I love the textures and the flavors. I love the spices and the herbs. I love the smells of breads and cakes and the way that icing melts on your tongue. I adore the way some foods are tasted on the tip of your tongue and some are tasted on the sides in the back. I love the differences between bitter and sweet. I swoon over chocolate and salt. Textures are seductive. Crunchy beer battered fried fish teases. Even celery can be tricky since it pairs so well with peanut butter. So, yes, I eat, I gain weight.
Exercise? I have all the best intentions, I do. My husband and I have a designated room for exercising with a Total Gym and a recumbent bike; it even has a television and stereo so you can't get bored. We have a Wii and it has Wii Fit. I stood on the balance board and it made a sad, sort of crying sound...the sound that your dog would make if you sat on him...and I put the damn thing away. I really don't need to be insulted by electronics, you know? Anyway, honestly, I am just not all that much in the mood most of the time to exercise. I have a lot of aches and pains from Fibromyalgia and I work long hours. When I get home from work, all I really want to do is eat for heaven's sake and maybe watch some Lost or What Not To Wear and get into bed. I feel like that isn't asking so much!
Which brings me to why we are here. Last week, dear hubby tells me he contacted MediWeight Loss for me and wants me to look into it. Not because he doesn't love me like I am (uh-huh) but because he worries about my health. I appreciate it and I know this costs a good amount of money, so I know he has put some thought into it. I have decided to go ahead with it, since the last time he was insistent on something like this, he managed to get me to quit smoking after 25 years.
Tomorrow night after work I have my first appointment. I am not 100% sure what to expect beyond what it says on the website:
I will try to keep up on how this adventure goes for me. I am looking forward to a "new" approach and am going into this with an open mind and outlook.
Todays weight: 187!!!